hyperfixations (8/17-8/21/26)

didn't pilot the EVA all month

(i've STILL yet to skate in my 30s)

SINCE LAST TIME

i've seen

SPIDER-MAN: BRAND NEW DAY

3 TIMES

i'll get

"DE SPRITZ"

(the only way to celebrate)

on my

BIRTHDAY

(rain or shine)

watched

Nippon Sangoku

SEASON 3

of

MY ADVENTURES WITH SUPERMAN

was

FUCKING PEAK

(the ending made me cry)

watched

MOURINHO

(...sorry in advance for tweaking...)

still been

"busy"

so

ONES O' MEDIA

(roll call edition)

OHH YEAH ALSO

i'm

"LOWERING YOUR DOSAGE"

(going monthly)

BRING IT ON: ALL OR NOTHING

HAYDEN PANETTIERE 

passing has me 

FUCKED UP

(Heroes and Tiger Cruise are very special to me)

AND

if you 

"KNOW ME"

(intimately understand i’m just a horsegirl with a horsecock)

you're

PAINFULLY AWARE

of the fact that

I LOVE THIS MOVIE

(it's up there with Stick It and Napoleon Dynamite)

so to

HONOR A LEGEND

(literally what the fuck)

i decided to

PAY MY RESPECTS

(check on your legendary friends)

you know shit's

"PEAK"

(xtra small soffe shorts...back handsprings...racial harmony)

when

THE FIRST THING YOU HEAR

is

"WHAT YOU WAITING FOR ?!?"

by

GWEN STEFANI

(gen X jesus)

it's my favorite 

"DADA MOVIE"

(you can laugh at it...cum to it and learn something)

i watched

THE OG ONE

(a solid 4.5/5 on the wackability scale…STILL)

AND

this one is 

WAYYYYYYYY BETTER

(Rhianna is in it…game bitch…)

Shabooya

Sha...Sha

Shabooya

ROLL CALL

(damn near a negro spiritual)

is literally

"ICONIC"

(timeless beyond measure)

THESE MFERS 

had

SOLANGE

(my favorite Knowles)

calling this mfer a

"BARBIE LOOKIN' HEFFA"

(something clearly written in 2005)

EVEN THOUGH

it's

TIMELESS

(my kids are going to be sick of this movie)

there's a

VARNISH

of

"SLUTTERY"

(only missing cum)

that

REEKS

of

THE EARLY 2000s

(the good ol' days)

A LOT

of

CAPRIS

(massive fan)

A LOT

of

LIP GLOSS

(bring it back)

A LOT

of 

BELLY BUTTONS

(oddly more arousing than i thought)

AND

even more

LOOSE YUCKERS

(thank you)

the

"KRUMPING SCENE"

(the reason why the side of my mattress looked like a leopard)

is still

PEAK WHACKTERIAL

(raw tension is hotter than raw insertion)

unfortunately

...WINNIE IS HOT...

(would smash to bits)

BUT

she’s a textbook 

🤸‍♀️C …U… N …T🤸‍♀️

(only sucks cock for approval…never personal enjoyment)

like

BRITNEY

(the only purebred anglo i’d let krump on me)

i'm

TOO GOOD

to be

IGNORED

(🤪)

"…that freak bitch is nuts…we need her…"

(even while my pom poms are buried)

BUT

unlike

BRITNEY

(my favorite snowbunny)

I'M BLACK

(AS FUCK)

so

MY EXPERIENCE

has been 

BLACK

(AS FUCK)

having to

ENDURE SHIT LIKE:

“OMG...DO WE HAVE...LIKE...MUTUALS!?!”

"oMg..dO wE HaVE...LiKe...mUtUALs!?!"

(🙃 🔫)

but

WE ALL KNOW

i'm

JESSE

(kind eyes…scrumptious penis…decent herkie)

if not

KIRRESHA

(somewhere eating chips...OBNOXIOUSLY LOUD)

ALSO

calling someone 

"A WIGGER"

(literally the funniest thing i've ever heard)

is

FUCKING INSANE

(i’m bringing it back)

you know you're a 

🤸‍♀️C …U… N …T🤸‍♀️

(someone people only tolerate when they have to)

when

RIHANNA 

(my favourite billionaire)

has to

CALL YOU

a 

"FUCKING LOSER"

(a delusional n-word unfit to lead)

☢︎