didn’t pilot the EVA all week

(…this is my favorite skate weather…)

on my ride

last friday

my

audiobook reservation

for

Sunrise on the Reaping

came through

(s/o the Brooklyn Public Library)

SUZANNE COLLINS

CAN

WRITE

HER

FUCKING ASS OFF

(my wounded inner teen really loved this one)

the movie is going to

SLAP

(they got Cruella de Vil to play Drusilla 🤯)

i know i’m

“late”

(didn’t inhale it day one…like a book bop)

BUT

i‘d literally

NEVER FINISH THIS

(in a timely manner)

if i didn’t have the

audiobook

(yes it counts…y'all sound like fascists)

FINAL RATING

4.5/5

(i would have hit the bottle too)

been playing

Chrono Trigger

for

the first time

it’s

PEAK

(i’m getting my skull cracked open pixel by pixel)

there’s

“game theory”

(A FUCKING BRAIN ON DE PITCH)

that even the

BEEFIEST

of

GPU’s

couldn’t process

(I’M WILLING TO WHORE FOR A 5090)

been watching

Women's Champions League

(y’all are going crazy…keep it up)

in honor of

“SPOOKY SZN”

i started watching

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

again

(SHE ROUNDHOUSE KICKED BRUH DOWN THE STAIRS)

still been doing

ALL OF THE THINGS

(surprisingly my head doesn’t hurt…yet)

so

ONES O’ MEDIA

(good boy core edition)

(homework or whorehouse)

SMALL SOLDIERS

this is going to sound

“privileged”

(i work really hard…i don’t care anymore)

BUT

i was

biking home

and i seen

David Cross

and was like

“whoa!…you're my childhood…but what part”

it wasn’t until

HOURS LATER

i realized

“HOLY SHIT…SMALL SOLDIERS”

(and Arrested Development obvi)

so i watched it again

i think i watched this movie

EVERYDAY

as a child

(if not all day)

it’s

PROBABLY

the reason

i’m a

“stinky commie”

(literally fucking correct)

now

it’s literally

Toy Story

for

“twisted kids”

(soon to be extremely funny adults)

this movie

taught me

A LOT

(NEVER TRUST CAPITALIST)

tasteless

capitalist

psychopaths

will always do

STUPID SHIT

like

“put munitions chips in toys?!?!”

turning

Chip Hazard

(a crazy white man)

into

Chip “The Sociopath” Hazard

(a crazy white man)

I’M

ARCHER

LIKE A MFER

(I’M NOT SAYING SHIT UNTIL I’M FREE)

but

if i’m most like

any of the

humans

i’m

Alan’s mom

(idk what’s going on…but did you see my forehand?!???)

if not

BBY Kirsten Dunst

(just hop on dumb fuck)

“nOt aLaN?”

not really

(i have rizz)

but we do

dress alike

(“SWEDDAH WEDDAH”)

we both dress in

“Good Boy Core”

(homework or whorehouse…you'll never know)

☢︎