didn't pilot the EVA all week

(...i kinda wanna make a silly lil video...)

i've never seen

The Handmaid's Tale

(calm down...it's on my list)

BUT

i started watching

The Testaments

(that first episode is WILD)

so many

BARE FACED BADDIES

(praise be your works)

started

cooking

again

(i missed food science)

AND

started

doodlin'

again

(missed this too)

still been

"busy"

(cocky deserves boing boing)

so

ONES O' MEDIA

(gaffer edition)

(the core tenets of futbol)

NUTMEG

OKAY SO

i didn't initially

plan on getting this game

(i didn't even know it existed until a few weeks ago)

BUT

i refunded

SAMSON

(I BELIEVED IN YOU)

AND

i needed

something else to play

(i can't keep whooping yall's ass in REMATCH)

IRONICALLY

this was

the exact same price

(the universe knew it was time)

this was

supposed to be

the year i finally

CAVED IN

and became a slave to

Football Manager

(unc initiation)

BUT

that game came out as

ABSOLUTE FUCKING DOG SHIT

(someone on Steam said it's so bad it cured their addiction)

SO

i was

FORCED

to try something

"diffrent"

(some fuck ass futbol skinned card game)

BUT

to my suprise

I FUCKING LOVE IT

(i'm really a 70 year old english man in spirit)

it's like if

Balatro

and

Football Manager

fucked on

a felt table

(something that should have happend years ago)

CURRENTLY

i'm on my

6th Season

as manager of

Blackpool

in the

3rd Division

(SIRI PLAY DREAMS AND NIGHTMARES)

i like this game

A LOT

because it's

EXTREMELY SIMPLE

but at the same time

EXTREMELY COMPLEX

(literally the core tenets of futbol)

even in this

stripped down

RETRO

table top

version of

futbol

(literally just probabality porn)

you

STILL

feel an insane

SENSE OF PRIDE

when you're

WHOOPING ASS

(statistically)

you could

sim every game

based on

WIN PERCENTAGE

(literally like praying to the gods for rain)

OR

do

THE SMART THING

when given the opportunuty to

"be the gaffer"

(trusting in the heart of the cards pitch side)

ALWAYS

ALWAYS

ALWAYS

BELIEVE IN CHANCE

(it's amazing what you can do if you just believe)

even

aesthetically

this is

FAR SUPERIOR

to

Football Manager

(i wish computers were still this simple)

this game proves

a few things:

ONE

even if you have an

88% CHANCE OF WINNING

you can

ABSOLUTELY BOTTLE IT

by just

"GOING THROUGH THE MOTIONS"

(not taking games seriously because you're too over confident)

TWO

even in a fucking

VIDEO GAME

playing

5 IN THE BACK

will not

SAVE YOU

(it's downright shameful behavior IN ALL REALITIES)

THREE

4-3-3

(in a high press or holding shape)

is

THE BEST FORMATION

for

MOST SITUATIONS

(if you can't win with that...idk what to tell you)

FOUR

you don't need

ANIMATED MATCHES

LICENSED TEAMS

OR

PLAYER LIKENESS

to make

A FUCKING BANGER

(USE YOUR IMAGIANTION...IT'S A VIDEO GAME)

SO

if you

LOVE FUTBOL

(this shit literally consumes my life)

YEARN

for

FUTBOL OF YESTERYEAR

(pre VAR but still littered with BULLSHIT)

AND

ABSOLUTELY

FUCKING HATE

LOSER ASS

FOOTBALL MANAGER

(she's abusive...it's okay to leave)

this

FUCK ASS

FUTBOL SKINNED

CARD GAME

IS

PERFECT FOR YOU

(she actually loves me)

☢︎