didn't pilot the EVA all week

(if you miss my presence…apologize)

watched the new season of

King of The Hill

THE KING IS BACK

AND HE’S CULTURED

(it feels like so natural it's scary)

I CAN'T WAIT FOR MORE

THANK YOU

MIKE JUDGE

played

LOLLIPOP CHAINSAW

Re-POP

and

I LOVED IT

(i wasn't expecting it to be that funny)

y'all know i love me a good

"stylish"

(CUNTY BEYOND BELIEF)

hack and slash

this one might be the

CUNTIEST ONE

even if i think zombies are overdone

except for:

Nazi Zombies

LEFT 4 DEAD

The Walking Dead

or

The Last of Us

it's

"white guy horny"

as fuck tho

(bordering pedophilia...but it's okay...she's 18...canonically)

if i had played this as a kid

(like i wanted to)

Juliet

would have been prime

"baitin' material"

(my lil meat wouldn't have had a day off)

but now as an

"adult"

(old enough to wack it to age-appropriate peak on Reddit)

before the second stage

i was like

"let me put some pants on this bitch"

watched

Tokapi's Original Sin

(so many feels)

didn’t cry tho

which is weird because that's like my old life

(the cycle of violence-pi)

but it did

(on multiple occasions)

make me

so

physically uncomfortable

i ended up contorting my body

into the shape of one of the many

dying roaches

that reside in the corners of my apartment

(flat on back..legs in the air twitching...clinging to dear life)

even if it did make me squirm

I LOVED IT

(which is crazy because it's usually the other way around)

i’ve slowed down to a crawl

and my body thanks me for that

so

ONES O’ MEDIA

(Mike Judge Meat Rider Edition)

(mixed hood booger madness)

IDIOCRACY

this was one of my fav

"Comedy Central Bangers"

(content wildly inappropriate for a 9-year-old)

i used to have a running joke

(like in 2016 when shit started getting moronic)

that i should have bought stock in

BRAWNDO

("it's got electrolytes")

this movie eats

ON ALL LEVELS

its

horny

funny

GALAXY BRAIN SMART

and

fart joke fucking stupid

(my favorite combo)

so since we’ve

finally reached peak

"IDIOCRACY"

we must explore

so here

i think

Mike Judge

and i

have the same

"eerily clairvoyant"

shit

("literally what other outcome is there?")

"How did he call it so early???"

the writing is on the wall

(almost to the point it's written in shit)

so if you have the eye for it

(or the nose for it)

it's pretty obvious

it's not that difficult to look at the current

"landscape"

(years of white men doing psycho shit in the name of the lord)

and go

"we're cooked"

there's shit depicted in this movie

that seemed

“far-fetched”

at the time

(living through Dick Cheney’s wet dream)

BUT NOW

only 20 years later

(NOT 500)

we're seeing the effects of

"concentrated stupidity"

(the government being run by a glove giving pedophile)

seemingly endless amounts of porn

fruit punch water fountains

100% icon-based interfaces

slow talkers

corporations running the government

and worst of all

treating reality like reality television

(so the last 8 months)

i don't even think

President Camacho

would approve of this bullshit

(that mfer got boo'd at SummerSlam...what a fucking clown)

at least he sought out proper help

i'm like a

non conformist

anti capitalist

skater freak

(who actively says fuck institutions)

and even i

appreciate the

semblance of order

provided by a

"decent government"

(one that sees people like people and not cattle)

i'm definitely not the smartest person in the world

so i’m not fully like

Joe

(my SAT score would make you question your taste)

BUT

i am

top 5% autistic

so some shit is so

PAINFULLY OBVIOUS

it makes my ears ring

most things are very simple

"Are your watering your garden...with water?"

(practicing bare minimum self-actualization)

if not

get on it

if you are

keep waiting

it's very simple

either your brain is on

or it is not

(being a dumb fuck is a full-time job)

Maya Rudolph

is so fucking fine in this

(SHE WAS SERVING HOOKER CHIC)

i have a case of

"mixed hood booger madness"

so as a kid

she was

PEAK

(yes...i was baitin')

watching this now

really confirms all the things i've been

"wrestling with"

(life is so fucking annoying)

like it fully cemented me wanting kids

if we keep letting these

"DUMB FUCKS"

"DUMB FUCK"

(indiscriminately)

we might never know peace again

keeping people

POOR AND STUPID

is the only way these corporations can keep

"butt fucking"

people

RELENTLESSLY

AGAIN

like a cunty little bee

may or may not have told you by now

"a little cum won't kill you"

(it might just save the world)

plus

"it's got electrolytes"☢︎